I don't want this place to be about my pain. But I'm not going to lie - it's tremendous. I honestly don't know how to get through it in some moments. But you just have to keep on going.

Carry on, I guess. Sad that life can be boiled down to an everyday meme.

It's rough inside my head. I managed to give a presentation yesterday, spoke about Henry and our situation, in class. It's for a prenatal diagnosis support group. Because people shouldn't feel so alone.

I'm told that I'm not alone. My neonatal hospice nurse tells me that all the time. But, I still haven't spoken to anyone who has experienced a similar situation. I want to institute a program where patients and families can connect, and find comfort. Maybe even hope.

I'm having trouble remembering to take my prenatal vitamins now. I wonder if this is all in my head. I realized this morning that I haven't taken them in days. Part of me wants to shrug, and give up. Another part of me rages because I feel like I'm sabotaging him - that I'm intentionally cutting his time short. I want all the time I can have with him, but I don't want him to suffer. How's that for a dilemma?

I'm so torn. I hurt so much inside, but I can't give in. I think that if I give in, I'll never come back out.