This is the age we live in -- I actually have to worry about hundred of friends reacting to our news. I'm drafting something to put on Facebook on Saturday or Sunday. It's far enough from Valentine's Day to allow people to have a moment before I spew horrible news all over.
I'm worried that once 'everyone' knows, I'll be expected to cry more. People look at me like I'm insane when I explain what's been going on. But, quite frankly, I need to function over the next eighteen weeks. I can't just dissolve into nothingness because this is happening to us. Life goes on, even as we mourn. I find that if I take a clinic approach to things, I am better equipped to get through the day with minimal tears. I can't be a weeping mess over the next four months! I would probably lose my job -- even though I have an amazing support system there. I'm lucky.
It's okay when I'm with other people. I can forget. When I'm alone.. I can't escape myself.
Amelia's eighteen month checkup was today. She's absolutely perfect. I all ready knew that.
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