Holidays

I'm continuing my trend of attempting to be completely and viscerally honest here.

The holidays suck. They really, really do.

I can see Henry in my mind - exactly how he would have looked. I can see him in my mind at six months, a year, twenty years. I can't stop it. He's living in my head.

Not in a creepy way -- I know he's gone, but, it's there. I'm struggling with the milestones. Thanksgiving was decent enough. We kept it low-key, and mostly enjoyed the naps. But Christmas.

Oy.

My husband and I were talking this morning about ways to make it better. We're involved with a group of other parents, bereaved and struggling with the holidays as well. There's tons of advice out there to lessen the sharp edge of grief, but really, you have to make it your own.

So. Our way of making it our own. We want to donate. We want to make it a tradition, every year, that we pick out a toy that Henry would have liked. Amelia's going to help us every year. We'll pick them out, and find a good charity (Toys for Tots, maybe?) to send the gifts off to every Christmas.

I'd like to open this up to everyone.

If Henry has touched your heart in any way, won't you consider reaching out to others?

If you do, I'd love to hear about it. Either on my Facebook page [https://www.facebook.com/MinneapolisMom] , or here. <3